Back in the U.S.

Namaste Friends!

Well, I'm finally back in the United States. I still have some things to share with you from my journey to India on the blog but for now I am in Michigan. While in the Vipassana retreat in India I learned my father was diagnosed with cancer. Now we're waiting for test results and we're not sure what treatment he'll require.

I need to be with my family here in Michigan now and I'm not sure how long this whole process is going to take. Those of you who know me well know how much my father means to me.I'm looking at this as an opportunity to be here for my father, as he's been there for me so many times throughout my life.

Please include my father John in your prayers for healing and a complete recovery. I would also appreciate you sending your positive energy and healing thoughts my way. One way to do this is by using Tonglen, a Buddhist healing meditation. In this form of selfless meditation you breathe in another's pain so they can be well, and then breathe out, sending them whatever you feel would bring them relief and happiness. Cancer is associated with heat, anger and unexpressed feelings and emotions. So in my Dad's case, he needs cooling thoughts of peace, self-love and faith that he can be strong enough to fight this disease. Some people think that taking in another's pain could be harmful to them. But the truth is that the only thing Tonglen can hurt is your ego, that which causes suffering in the first place.

Thank you for all your support. I look forward to seeing you all again.

Love and blessings,
Lynne

P.S. Please keep checking the new and previous blog entries as I will be adding more pictures and writings about the trip as time allows. Namaste!

Om on the Ganga

So, after a couple of days of recovering from the Vipassana retreat, a friend and I travel by jeep from Dehradun to Rishikesh. We are both tired of being crammed into small places so buy two seats a piece in an otherwise overloaded jeep to spoil ourselves for this 45 minute journey down the mountain. We sit in the back facing each other, holding on tight and watching as Dehradun fades in the distance.

Rishikesh is probably one of my favorite places in India. Remember that the last time I was here I stayed at Parmarth Niketan Ashram for the 7 day yoga festival. This time I had a chance to really get familiar with all that Rishikesh has to offer.

We decide to stay at a place that Andrea stayed on her last visit. She bragged about how good the food was and we couldn't wait to have something different to eat after ten days of bland ashram food. The Swiss Cottages are set up on the side of the mountain with an incredible view of the Ganges River. The canteen has a great selection of western and Indian food along with a really tasty bakery with mouth-watering pastries. Andrea, being from Germany, couldn't wait to bite into another one of their sweet rolls. But I go more for the muffins and cookies. They have a really nice brown bread roll ( that's what they call wheat here!) and their veggie burger is the best in India so far! It was nice to taste something different.

We realize that this is the last chance the both of us will have to swim in the Ganga so the next morning we put our bikinis on and head down to find a hidden beach where we are told we can actually expose our bodies, something very uncommon, especially in Northern India. Lucy, one of our fellow Vipassana mates, told us about a beach up north of town.

As we walk down a beautiful tree-lined road on the bank of the Ganges, we pass many monkeys, small and large, harmless and uninterested in us, unlike others I've encountered. A couple of westerners turned Indian bikers offer directions and a ride. We decline, the ride I mean. We take snaps of others meditating down on huge rocks beside the river from the road above. Then we find a trail that leads downward and follow it onto the sandy shoreline.

There are only a few others, as Lucy said there would be, who share this relatively secluded area with us, oh except the dozen or so men on the roof of a building on the opposite side of the river doing construction. We find a place to leave our things and step into the freezing water. OMG! I am not kidding when I say c-c-c-cold! Andrea plunges in first and then encourages me to follow. Actually, she lies and says it's not as cold once you are in. I last about 30 seconds the first time and have to get out before hypothermia sets in. It is amazing to be submerged in this healing river though. Once we are both in we laugh out loud believing that all of our sins are being washed away.

We lie on the shore and watch rafters drifting by. We climb on enormous boulders and see the shoreline unfold around winding bends of sparking white sand. There's silver in the sand here like I've never seen before. It shines in the sun as it runs between my toes and fingers. The sun is intense and our senses are incredibly alive after ten days of silent self-observation.

We leave before sunset to catch the 6pm Aarti on the Ganga at the Parmarth Ashram. Andrea missed it last time she was here so we make sure to get there right on time. It isn't as full as when the festival was here but still the music rings in our ears blissfully. We sing and pass the Shiva fire that extinguishes impurity. We have an incredible dinner in a small cafe where Andrea had eaten previously. We sit on the floor and listen to old Enigma tunes and I eat the biggest tofu sizzler I have ever seen. We were going to eat hail to the Queen, some outrageous chocolate dessert, but decide on banana pancakes instead.

What a day. Perfect and complete. Getting close to the end of my journey with thoughts of my Dad. Time to go home soon. I love India and am torn away from her loving arms, her surreal backdrops, her unique scents, her sometimes absurd scenes, back to reality.

I know I will return. I haven't seen the Taj Mahal!

Love & blessings!
Lynne

Surviving Vipassana

Hello and sorry for keeping everyone on hold. There have been some very significant changes occurring all around and within and I want to share them all with you.

The Vipassana retreat was mind-blowing to say the least. It was definitely one of the most challenging and powerful things I have ever done in my life. I had only read a bit about it before entering the retreat so really had no idea what to expect. I knew it was ten days of silence and that sounded really great to me after two and a half months out in the streets of India where you are constantly on your toes in an unpredictable reality. Ten days of silence sounded really peaceful.

Peace comes from within.

On our first night we found rooms and roommates and were fed our first of many simple Indian buffet-style meals in the small segregated cafeteria room. There were two long tables with chairs on either side in the center of the room. Chairs were also set around the edges of the room facing the walls, some looking out onto a grove of mango trees. That night we were all talking and getting to know each other. After we ate we all gathered in the main meeting room to get a briefing on the next ten days. This is when the silence began. Around nine we were told to return to our rooms and at 4am the bell woke us for our first day of meditation beginning at 4:30am. Several sessions of sitting were narrated by S. N. Goenka, the world's leading authority on the true form of the Buddha's teachings, called Vipassana.

The first day we were introduced to the pre-Vipassana style of meditation called Anapana, a focus on the breath at the nostrils. This creates a very pleasant tingling in the area where the breath goes in and out and trains the mind to focus for the deeper forms that we will be introduced to later. Gradually, day by day, the practice deepens. We are guided by Goenka during mediation periods by listening to taped recordings of a past retreat where he himself was teaching. Our teacher is called an "assistant teacher" and is simply in charge of playing the tapes at appropriate times and then every other day or so we go one by one up to the front and sit with him to ask questions and have our progress reviewed by meditating together.

He was amazingly angelic and each time I approach him and sit at his feet he says, "hello my child, please come and sit." This helps me feel comfortable, along with his sweet tender voice. He asks how I am doing and if I am feeling the different levels of progression. He then seems to know exactly what I "need" to hear, usually not what I want to hear though. I notice a sharp pain on the third or fourth day shooting through my shoulder and into my neck and see that other students are now using chairs. So, my next visit to him I ask if I may sit in a chair and see if it helps the pain. He tells me I am young and strong and that chairs are for the sick and old. He tells me to sit with "determination". I go back to my seat and tough it out for the next hour or so. Afterwards, he motions me back to him. I'm not sure if I was grimacing or what but he tells me that it is OK if I sit against the wall for the next session to see if it helps. I tell him I am forty-five and not so young. He laughs and says I am looking young though. The next time I sit with him his greeting has changed to, "hello my young child, come and sit." We both chuckle. He has a beautiful smile and a truly angelic presence. He is dressed in all white and seems to magically appear and disappear through a doorway up and away from all of the students.

The next several days I am faced with every fear , desire, pain and insecurity I have allowed to manifest in my body. The mind reacts and then we are told to witness the sensation and sit completely still for one hour increments. What a test. I watch as the severity of sensation increases and decreases, fluctuating from mild tingling to throbbing intense agony. We are told that the pain represents emotions, thoughts, etc. that are held in our bodies and cause imbalance and impurity. So to witness and remember that everything is impermanent, even this agonizing pain, is the main idea of Vipassana. All situations in life - whether pleasant or unpleasant - will pass, don't cling to them.

As I witness my pain and direct my attention along a path of awareness I have created in the past few days within my body, I do notice some relief. I sit still finally for one whole period about the eighth day and find a truly calming result. I do feel like I am releasing long-hidden trauma deep from within. I watch as the pain ascends from cell tissue onto the surface of my body in different places each day. And, as every day is different, every moment becomes a new journey as it exposes strength and weakness, focus and distraction. I am faced with the I am that I am.

In the end many people see that the mind has played tricks on them throughout the past nine days. We are allowed to speak on the tenth day to share stories and re-acquaint ourselves with each other and the speaking world - now on a deeper level. I feel like I know the others well, even though we haven't spoken since the beginning. We were told not to make eye contact, to touch anyone or even use gestures to communicate throughout the retreat. So everyone has stories about how they almost screamed when they saw the huge spider dangling beside their bed. Or how they thought the lady in charge hated them because she was always catching them doing things that were unknowingly prohibited. It was fun to finally see how some people actually spoke and moved in the real world after 10 days of moving around each other in a silent bliss. The grounds were very secluded and we could only walk in small areas so I found myself circling and weaving in and out of the same people, who also needed to move after meals for digestion and sanity like myself, and I got to know their routines as I created my own; wake up, drink water, stretch, bell, meditate, bell, lie down for 20 minutes, bell, meditate, bell, use restroom, eat, walk, lie down, bell, drink water, meditate, etc. You get the idea.

It was a very surreal experience that I will never forget. I made some great friends. My roommate was actually an American woman from upstate New York who now lives in Dehradun at a place called Vipassana House (www.himalayanhealingcenter.org). This mansion was originally a family home. But the man who owns it, a former attorney in America, made it into a retreat center for those looking for healing or just a rest. You truly feel like family here and the house itself is over 100 years old, filled with amazing energy and beautiful marble floors with spacious rooms and breathtaking views. Many of us from the Vipassana retreat stay here the first night after being released and celebrate by singing and playing musical instruments. We share stories about our incredible journey and help each other process the information that is so blatantly revealed during the meditation. We become a family that evening and know that we will all meet again, some day, some where, some lifetime!

It is incredible to be amongst so many wonderful people from so many far away places with such different lifestyles and realities. And yet to feel so close and supported by fellow spiritual beings in such an amazing place like India. What a blessing. Thank you all for being there for me.

Love & Light,
Lynne

10 Days of Silence in Dehradun

Namaste everyone!

Today I'll be entering a 10 day silent Vipassana retreat in Dehradun, Uttaranchal. The meditation center is pictured above. Vipassana, which means to see things as they really are, is one of India's most ancient techniques of meditation. You can read more about Vipassana here: www.dhamma.org/vipassan.htm. For a more personal take on the experience, here's a Yoga Journal article on one woman's experience, titled "How I Learned to Love Meditation": www.yogajournal.com/meditation/134_1.cfm.

If you're really interested, there are two (relatively) local Vipassana retreats coming up: a weekend non-residential retreat from April 7-9 at the Lotus Meditation Center in Grand Forks, ND (for more info contact Lora Sloan at 701-787-8839, or
lorasloan@gra.midco.net); the other, a 10-day residential retreat from June 9-18 at the Christine Center in Willard, Wisconsin (www.tcvc.info/pages/retreats.htm).

Anyway, just wanted to let you know I'll be out of touch until the end of the retreat. I'll let you know how it went then!

Love and blessings,
Lynne

The Teachers at Parmarth Internat'l Yoga Festival

H.H. Pujya Swami Chidanand Saraswati is president of Parmarth Niketan Ashram where the yoga festival took place. He left his home at eight years old and spent his youth in seclusion, silence and sadhana in the Himalayas. Today he is world renowned as a great saint, spiritual leader, visionary and divine guide to many. His religion is Unity and he has been a leader in numerous international interfaith conferences. He has lead a number of peace pilgrimages across the world. The yoga taught by Swamiji is a total yoga - of body, mind, spirit and soul. It is a yoga for every minute and every day of our lives.

Dr. David Frawley is one of the few westerners recognized in India as a Vedacharya of the ancient wisdom. In 1991 he was named Vamadeva Shastri, after the Vedic Rishi Vamadeva. In 1995 he was given the title of Pandit along with Brahmachari Vishwanathji award for his knowledge of the Vedic teachings. He is a renowned author with topics ranging from Vedanta to Yoga and Ayurveda. (The book I bought is wonderful and so informative!) He has lectured at major Vedantic and Yogic institutions in both America and India.

Sri Birjoo Mehta is a long-standing disciple of Sri B.K.S. Iyengar as well as the managing trustee of the Light on Yoga Research Trust. He has been a student of Iyengar since 1975 and since 1984 has accompanied him on many tours in India and abroad. Birjoo had been teaching Iyengar Yoga in Mumbai (Bombay) for 18 years. He is a full time Engineer as well. His classes were the most informative yoga classes I have ever attended. I learned more in a week with Birjoo than I ever could have imagined. I began my week thinking I would attend alternating classes with Gurmukh's Kundalini but came back every day to learn more about structure and alignment with Birjoo. I couldn't stay away knowing that I could attend Kundalini in the states and that Birjoo is here in India, much further away. I did do Kundalini the first and last day of the conference. Her classes ROCK!


Gurmukh Kaur Khalsa is a world renowned Kundalini Yoga instructor. She is the cofounder and director of Golden Bridge, Los Angeles' premier center for the study and practice of Kundalini Yoga and mediation. She is a direct disciple of kundalini yoga master Yogi Bhajan. She has been teaching for over thirty years and is also a prolific author on the ways kundalini yoga can be used to bring peace and health to the body, mind and soul.

Anyone who has taken my classes for any time knows how much I love Gurmukh and Kundalini. We do a few very powerful poses in our everyday yoga classes in Bemidji and everyone seems to feel the energy moving as we rest and close our eyes afterwards to tune into the power of internal light awakening within. The classes with her felt like a blessing. I am not saying they weren't difficult. Actually, many times my arms felt like they were going to fall off if I didn't drop them from the posture. But with her encouragement and love I kept going and at the end could feel the awakening beginning. In one class, the last day of the conference, I actually saw the bright pink aura expanding around my hands as I looked between them and through an imaginary lens while we did long deep breaths, holding and pumping our bellies. It was very powerful. I hope to do some training with her in the fall and bring back even more knowledge of this very heartfelt yoga.

Sadhvi Abha Saraswati has been an avid yoga practitioner since the age of 25, when through yoga she cured herself of a terminal kidney ailment called nephritis. Since then she has delved deeply into various forms of yoga and has become not only a practitioner, but also a teacher. She resides at Parmarth where she teaches yoga nidra. I attended one day and slept through the whole thing, which she said was ok. The next time was a guided meditation in savasana accompanied by her voice and a sitar tuner - very relaxing. She also teaches nada yoga. Learning traditional chants from her and listening to her most angelic voice was a blessing in itself. I am working on learning by heart Gayatri Mantra, a beautiful hymn song during many celebrations.

Happy Holi

Today is Holi Day, a day to celebrate many things here in India and to burn away negative emotions from our physical bodies. I went out into the streets today taking a couple of boys from the ashram as body guards because Swamiji says it can get out of hand. We also did a bit of our own celebrating, singing, playing music and painting each other in the temple. I also learned how to make chapatis for lunch. You see we sit on the floor when we eat here at this ashram, as the boys are doing here.

Below is an email I received today from Parmarth's swamiji, the ashram I stayed at last. Here are Swami Chidinanda's ideas about this holiday, called Holi Day. Enjoy!

Dear Divine Soul Lynne Ellen Baum,

Holi is one of the most festive, joyous holidays of the Hindu year. It is celebrated on the full moon day of Phalguna (February - March). The festival is marked by great revelry during which everyone paints each other with brightly colored powders. Song, dance and bright red, green, yellow and pink powder are the hallmarks of the occasion. Disciple and Divinity over Passion.

The meanings of Holi are numerous. For some, it is the festival of Springtime, the heralding of warm weather and bidding farewell to the winter. It is also seen as a festival of love, the return of fertility and virility. However, side by side with the celebration of love and fertility is the message to exercise control over the emerging passion. In some parts of India the story is told on Holi of Kamadeva (God of Love; Cupid), whom Lord Shiva burned to ashes as he tried to seduce Him out of His meditation. The message is: celebrate love, but don't get carried away.

Thus, Holi is a celebration of divinity and discipline over passion. Virtue Over Vice:The Puranas describe Holi as a celebration of virtue over vice. It is a time when we rejoice in the victory of pure, divine Prahlaad over his aunt Holika.

The story - in a simple, condensed way - says that Prahlaad was a young, beautiful, pure, divine devotee of God. However, Prahlaad's father was a powerful king who believed that everyone should worship him. At Prahlaad's refusal to do so, due to his singleminded love of God, his father decided to have him killed. Prahlaad's aunt (his father's sister), Holika, had been given a special shawl as a boon from God for various austerities she had performed. When she wore this shawl, she could not be burned by fire. So, Prahlaad's father and his sister devised a plan in which she would wear her shawl and hold Prahlaad tightly in her arms as they sat in fire. In this way, Prahlaad would be killed, but she would emerge unscathed. However, as divine plan works, a strong gust of wind came and blew the shawl off of her, as well as carried pure Prahlaad to safety. Holika was burned in the fire of her own evil.

One of the great obstacles in life to our spiritual progress is the difference between what we do or say on the outside and how we really are on the inside. Holika had performed certain austerities by which she was entitled to this boon from God. On the outside, she was "pious." But, on the inside she was not pure. Prahlaad, on the other hand, was a simple, pure, loving devotee of God. This is what saved him. This inner purity and inner piety are what truly save us, what truly make our lives divine.

So many of us go to temple, do the rituals, offer money to the priests, and chant a certain number of malas. Then, we go out and act in selfish, unpious, dishonest ways. These may not necessarily take the form of malicious transgressions. It may simply be the way we speak to our children or to our loved ones. It may simply be the way we try to cheat those with whom we do business. It may be the way we sit and gossip about others. All the rituals and puja in the world cannot make up for a lack of piety, honesty and compassion. The goal of going to temple is not just to perform rituals; the goal is to become spiritual. God is happier with pure, innocent, devoted Prahlaad than with all the austerities and rituals performed by his father and aunt.

Thus, on this divine occasion, we should pray to be filled with the purity and devotion of Prahlaad. We should commit ourselves to performing our puja, meditation and japa with focus, dedication and deep love for God. One meaning of the word Holi is sacrifice. On Holi we light so many bonfires to revel in joy and to burn the effigies of Holika. The meanings of these bonfires are to burn that which is devilish and impure, leaving only the purity and divinity after Holi.


However, we must remember not only to partake in the merry-making of a bonfire. We must remember to sacrifice that within us which is devilish and impure. There is some demon-nature in all of us. We must burn that demon-nature on Holi and emerge as pure and pious as divine Prahlaad.The fire of purity and divinity which we light on Holi must burn continuously in our hearts throughout the year. We must have an ever-burning bonfire of impurity, so that we are continuously renewed, continuously purified and continuously rejuvenated.

So, LET THIS HOLI BE A TIME WHEN WE CHANGE NOT ONLY THE COLOR OF OUR FACES, BUT THE COLOR OF OUR HEARTS. LET US NOT ONLY "PLAY" HOLI, BUT LET US BECOME HOLY. LET THE ONLY COLOR THAT TRULY PENETRATES OUR BEINGS BE THE COLOR OF GOD.FOR, ON THE MORNING AFTER HOLI THE OTHER COLORS WILL WASH AWAY. BUT WE MUST LET THE COLOR OF GOD BE INDELIBLE IN OUR EYES, IN OUR EARS AND IN OUR HEARTS.

May God bless you all and all your families.
With love and blessings.In the service of God and humanity,
Swami Chidanand Saraswati